goodbye
by ruatcaelum
Summary: She was too shocked to turn and help, too shocked even to cry.


Summary: 'She was too shocked to turn and help, too shocked even to care

Summary: 'She was too shocked to turn and help, too shocked even to care.'

Pairing: Gwen/Owen

Rating: K, I suppose

A/N: I wrote this about an hour after watching Reset. I was incredibly upset, and, well, I assume this fanfic shows it. Enjoy!

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Gwen, Tosh, Jack, Ianto and Martha Jones solemnly walked back into Torchwood, the deep silence of the huge room unusually deafening, its weight pressing down on their shoulders. Ianto helped a stunned Tosh walk over to the sofa, sitting down next to her and holding her close as the tears ran down her face and she shook silently. Jack and Martha walked mutely over to Jack's office, Jack slumping down onto his chair and Martha perching on the edge of his desk.

'I'm sorry,' Martha murmured after a moment, but Jack didn't respond.

Gwen stood at the entrance to the Hub, clenching and unclenching her hands as she stared blankly ahead at Owen's desk, at the mass of papers Ianto had always been nagging him to tidy, at the large amount of coffee mugs that had collected there over the last couple of days, at the teddy bear Jack had given him a few weeks ago as a joke present. Taking deep breaths, she slowly walked over to his desk and just stood there, not wanting to disturb the messed-up perfection that had been Owen's desk. She could hear the muffled sobs of Tosh and Ianto's soothing murmurs, trying to console her, from behind her, but she was too shocked to turn and help, too shocked to even cry.

After a minute she reached out a shaky hand and picked up the small brown bear from amongst the stuff piled on his desk, clutching it tightly to her chest, willing Owen to walk in the door, all smiles and inappropriate quips. Overcome by it all, she turned and ran off into the Hub, holding the bear tight in her arms, not stopping until she reached the boardroom, out of breath, furiously tapping the pin into the keypad, throwing herself through the door and slamming it shut behind her, stumbling forward to rest her hands on the cold, smooth, wooden table in front of her as tears began to block her vision, rolling down her face like condensation on a cold window. It was only after a few minutes Gwen realised the teddy bear had been thrown to the floor by accident and so she bent down to pick it up, turning away from the table to do so.

'Gwen,' She heard a voice from behind her say quietly and she instantly spun around, hair flying crazily, bear still tight in her arms.

'Wh… Owen?' She gasped, blinking disbelievingly at the apparition in front of her. 'But- but you're dead, I mean…' She started and the supposed "Owen" smiled sadly.

'I am,' He said softly and Gwen shook her head in disbelief.

'No, no, no, no, but…' She started muttering helplessly. 'Please,' She said softly, desperation shining in her tear-filled eyes. 'Don't leave me,' She was whispering now, taking a step forward towards the vision.

'I'm gone Gwen. I'm sorry but I'm not coming back,' He replied quietly.

'Then why are you here? Why are you doing this to me?' Gwen was sobbing again now and a look of pain flashed over Owen's face.

'This is all you, Gwen.' He said softly and Gwen approached some more until she was right against where he was leaning against the large boardroom table. Cautiously, she put out a hand to touch his face, letting out a small gasp when her fingers managed to connect with the soft skin of his cheek.

'Then how come I can touch you?' She whispered, but Owen didn't reply, just stared into her eyes, his own dark, wide and impenetrable.

Gwen took a deep breath. 'Owen, I want to say-'

But Owen interrupted her. 'Don't do this, Gwen. Don't make it harder than it already is.'

'No, Owen, let me talk. If you're not even real, if this is just some figment of my imagination, then what does it even matter anyway?' She said, struggling to hold back her tears. 'I love you, Owen. I know I love Rhys too, but that doesn't matter, because… well, none of that really matters any more, does it?' Owen didn't respond, his face remaining blank. 'Oh God, Owen, please say something.'

'Have a good life, Gwen Cooper,' He murmured and a tear ran down her face.

'Don't go,' She said simply and that sad smile was back on his face. Gwen stared at him for a moment before leaning forward and kissing him, her lips on his, and he kissed her back.

After a few seconds though, the sensation of his lips against hers began to fade and Gwen opened her eyes to see the whole form of Owen fade away from in front of her. But, just as the space in front of her became just that once more and he disappeared completely, she heard a voice whisper in her ear, four little words that brought a smile to Gwen Cooper's face for the first time in a while, and she moved to leave the room, teddy bear clutched tightly to her chest once more, a warm feeling spreading throughout her body, new to her after the cold emptiness that had filled her after Owen's death. It was time to move on, and what the soft voice had told her just then had made everything OK. Her world had been complete, just for a moment, Owen's voice in her ear.

'I love you too.'


End file.
